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My experiences with men over the past three years has really made me want to date from within the community, especially the non-binary community, from now on. Such a glorious day walking in @prideinlondon today with @studentpride !!! 🌈💛🔥 thanks @catandtheodore for the obligatory hand holding picture !!!A post shared by JAMIE WINDUST (@leopardprintelephant) on To anyone reading this who didn’t know anything about our community before, welcome!Secular folks have extensive wishlists too, but they don’t call them kingfish lists. But then it gets a little murkier when we look at the preferences which exclude, exploit, or fetishize marginalized people. I thought that being attracted to only white or Asian men wasn’t problematic at all. But I was completely ignoring the fact that there are real human beings on the other PC.

Let’s talk about our experiences and collectively laugh at the people that have wronged us, move on, get stronger, and be better!Meanwhile, the people who won’t give a fat person a second look frequently date sedentary thin individuals who eat junk food all day.The truth is that many of our preferences are nothing but excuses.At multiple times in my youth, I was urged to make a “kingfish list.” For you lucky ducks who’ve never heard of that, it was basically a list of attributes you believed your future spouse would have.The whole thing was rooted in patriarchy, courtship, and the notion that your kingfish list would prevent you from “wasting time” dating the wrong people. You know, back when I had no clue what a healthy relationship even entailed.

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